Not so long ago (actually, blooming years ago), a message saying “Lovely to see you last month, hope to see you again” carried weight – it was genuine. It meant you’d been noticed. It meant your presence mattered. That little line was personal. Genuine.
Remember those days?
You walked away feeling good. Someone had taken the time to say it directly to you.
The problem with automation
Now, nine times out of ten, it’s just marketing copy spat out by an email system. A line written once, then sent to hundreds, thousands, maybe millions of inboxes. “We miss you. Come back. This is just for you.” It’s never just for you though.
It’s just for your email address.
And because it’s so common, the words have lost their meaning. When everything is dressed up as personal, nothing feels personal at all.
Real connection looks different
You can spot the difference a mile off when someone actually means it. They’ll mention something you talked about. They’ll make it specific. Or they’ll surprise you by picking up the phone (shock, horror) not to flog you a product, not to push another ticket, but to carry on a conversation that already mattered.
That’s how humans connect. It doesn’t need to be polished. It just needs to be real.
Why so many businesses get this wrong
From a business point of view, automation is easy (too bloody easy). Type a line once, hit send, job done. Tick the marketing box.
But it’s lazy and people aren’t daft. They can tell the difference between a copied pleasantry and a message that was actually meant for them.
It’s the difference between a neighbour who stops to chat and stroke your dog versus one who just nods “morning” while hurrying past. One interaction feels empty, the other leaves a trace.
The cost of convenience
The obsession with scale and systems has stripped the humanity out of communication. Businesses forget that while automation saves time, it chips away at trust. And trust is what makes people come back – not a subject line that pretends you were missed.
The irony is, the effort isn’t even that big. One genuine message can do more than a thousand copy-and-paste pleasantries.
The punchline
If you really miss someone, prove it! Don’t just let your email software say it for you.
Questions I Hear About Genuine Communication
How Can You Tell If a Message Is Genuine or Automated?
Look for the detail. If someone mentions a specific thing you said or did, it is probably real. If it could have been sent to anyone, it is automated.
Do Automated Messages Ever Work?
They can remind people you exist, but they rarely build trust. The more you use them, the more people stop paying attention.
Why Should Businesses Bother Sending Personal Messages?
Because people notice the difference. A genuine note makes you stand out in a sea of copy and paste marketing.
Is Picking Up the Phone Still Relevant in Business?
Yes, more than ever. Hardly anyone does it now, which means a quick call feels refreshing and personal.
What Is the Risk of Relying Only on Automation?
You save time, but you lose connection. Over time, customers see you as noise, not as someone worth listening to.
Can Small Businesses Compete with Big Firms Without Automation?
Absolutely. In fact, being smaller gives you the edge, because you can be personal in ways big companies cannot.
How Often Should You Send a Personal Message?
Not constantly. One well-timed, thoughtful message can mean more than dozens of generic ones.